"Suffering is not worthless, and our lives are not our own to take." UPDATED: Brittany Maynard has died

A Catholic seminarian, dying of brain cancer, has penned a letter to Brittany Maynard, the 29 year old woman who has promised to commit suicide in the coming days to overcome her own bout with brain cancer, and it is your must read of the day:

In Brittany’s video, her mother mentions that her immediate hope was for a miracle.  My response to my diagnosis was the same – I hoped for a miraculous recovery so that I would not have to deal with the suffering and pain that was likely to come.  However, I now realize that a “miracle” does not necessarily mean an instant cure.  If it did, would we not die from something else later in our lives?  Is there any reason that we deserve fifteen, twenty, or thirty or more years of life?  Every day of life is
a gift, and gifts can be taken away in an instant.  Anyone who suffers from a terminal illness or has lost someone close to them knows this very well.

I have outlived my dismal prognosis, which I believe to be a miracle, but more importantly, I have experienced countless miracles in places where I never expected to find them.  Throughout my preparation for the priesthood I have been able to empathize with the sick and suffering in hospitals and nursing homes.  I have traveled to Lourdes, France, the site of a Marian apparition and a place of physical and spiritual healing that is visited by millions of pilgrims each year.  I have had the great opportunity to serve the infirm there who trust in God with their whole hearts to make sense of their suffering.  Through my interaction with these people, I received much more than I gave.  I learned that the suffering and heartache that is part of the human condition does not have to be wasted and cut short out of fear or seeking control in a seemingly uncontrollable situation.  Perhaps this is the most important miracle that God intends for me to experience.

Suffering is not worthless, and our lives are not our own to take.  As humans we are relational – we relate to one another and the actions of one person affects others.  Sadly, the concept of “redemptive suffering” – that human suffering united to the suffering of Jesus on the Cross for our salvation can benefit others – has often been ignored or lost in modern times.  It is perfectly understandable that medication should be made available to give comfort and limit suffering as much as possible during the dying process, especially during a terminal illness, but it is impossible to avoid suffering altogether.  We do not seek pain for its own sake, but our suffering can have great meaning if we try to join it to the Passion of Christ and offer it for the conversion or intentions of others.  While often terrifying, the suffering and pain that we will all experience in our lives can be turned into something positive. This has been a very difficult task for me, but it is possible to achieve.

There is a card on Brittany’s website asking for signatures “to support her bravery in this very tough time.”  I agree that her time is tough, but her decision is anything but brave.  I do feel for her and understand her difficult situation, but no diagnosis warrants suicide.  A diagnosis of terminal cancer uproots one’s whole life, and the decision to pursue physician-assisted suicide seeks to grasp at an ounce of control in the midst of turmoil.  It is an understandable temptation to take this course of action, but that is all that it is – a temptation to avoid an important reality of life.  By dying on one’s “own terms,” death seems more comfortable in our culture that is sanitized and tends to avoid any mention of the suffering and death that will eventually come to us all.

Brittany comments, “I hope to pass in peace.  The reason to consider life and what’s of value is to make sure you’re not missing out, seize the day, what’s important to you, what do you care about – what matters – pursue that, forget the rest.”  Sadly, Brittany will be missing out on the most intimate moments of her life – her loved ones comforting her through her suffering, her last and most personal moments with her family, and the great mystery of death – in exchange for a quicker and more “painless” option that focuses more on herself than anyone else.

Read the whole thing.

Five days ago, I added Ms. Maynard to my prayer list.  Today, I'll add Philip Johnson.

You might consider doing the same.

Carry on.

Please.

UPDATE: Brittany Maynard has taken her life.