Beautiful doesn't require sexy, sexy doesn't necessarily mean beautiful

I have no daughters.  

I do have nieces. 

I think each one of them should read the following... I think every woman should read the following:

Growing up, I knew I loved beautiful clothes, twirling for ages in any fabric that would float about me.  As a teenager, I ached and grasped for some standard of beauty.  My true and real feminine desire to please others – to be admired by others – got twisted into an equation that our culture tells us adds up correctly, but that in reality leaves us far from the right answer:

Stares from men = attention. Attention = attractiveness. Attractiveness = beauty.  Beauty = worth.

I never was any good at math.

It may be safe to say many women feel this way.  Consciously or not, we understand that fashion is a tool that communicates our desire to feel and be beautiful. Why else would we gravitate towards pretty things and care about what we wear, as well as cringe at the sight of sandals and socks?

Fashion speaks volumes about who we are as women – and who we want to be.  Too often, in the attempt to present ourselves as beautiful, we fall victim to trends that equate ideal, mature beauty with “sexiness.”  The relentless striving to be “sexy” can distort a woman’s longing to be desirable in the best sense of that word.  Straining for attention, women can often hide behind trends…even hide behind their own skin.

I know, because I hid behind my appearance to validate my yearning for self-worth.  This familiar, yet epidemic mindset is one of the many reasons I helped found Verily Magazine, a new publication that’s starting a fresh conversation on beauty, relationships, culture and lifestyle. By featuring fashion that complements rather than compromises a woman’s dignity,Verily hopes to invite all women to come to know their own worth.

There's more and I think it good.

We need to recapture what beauty is.  

It's not what too many think it is today.

Comments

[Leslie]

Just pre-ordered that magazine for my own nieces, thanks to your post. :)

What a brilliant idea for a magazine.

[GoneWithTheWind]

A few weeks ago I saw a bird doing a display dance for another bird. What little I know about birds leads me to believe it was a male bird courting a female bird. Most animals do this and sometimes it's the male and sometimes the female of the species. With most humans it is the female that "displays" to attract attention. I assume this is natural and the whole "Stares from men = attention" equation is nothing more then denial. Yes, this is what women do! Men, in general, are not attractive, don't primp or put on lipstick and eyeshadow, women do. Women are attractive, their bodies were designed to attract males for the purpose of mating. Is all of this too blunt to be acceptable? More importantly it is fact. It appears to me that at some point a woman dislikes this role, and often this occurs after they are past their prime or no longer find themselves attractive. It is then that they seem to develop remorse and want other wome to not dress to attract. Is it jealousy? Do they find themselves less sexy if to many others are too sexy? Are they still seeking attention and now their focus is on reducing the competition?