Weird is good!

by guest blogger, BroKen.

Teaching children at home has had amazing results for centuries. Here is a short list of some home schooled students; Leonardo da Vinci, Abraham Lincoln, Mozart, Edison. Still today, in spite of the rapid growth of homeschooling, there are some people who think we who homeschool our children are a little weird. But let me share with you a secret. Not many people know this, but it is very important. Here is the secret…. “Weird is good!”

Every home is different and has different reasons for their decision. Here are some of our reasons which might help you understand why this phenomenon of homeschooling continues to grow.

First, I do NOT think public schools are evil. Everywhere we’ve lived with our children we’ve found the teachers and administrators in public schools to be dedicated professionals with deep compassion for the children in their care. I know that many of them see their vocation as a calling from God. The fact that they cannot explicitly share their faith, does not prevent the implicit expression of that faith. We would not be concerned placing our children with them.

So, why homeschool? Maybe these stories will help you understand. The first story isn’t mine but it turned on a light in my head when I heard it.

A Baptist minister and his family came to serve a church which had a Christian School and so naturally his children attended that school. After they had been there several months, the mother was carrying their toddler one Sunday after church and passed by their thirteen year old son who was talking with his school buddies. The toddler instinctively reached out to the big brother. But the teenager, realizing the toddler would “blow his cool”, turned away to be with his school friends. Because of that incident, the minister took his children out of that school.

Unfortunately, school encourages identification with a student’s age group as opposed to their family group. That “peer pressure” is actually unnatural and certainly unnecessary for education. But since most of us went to schools like this, it is all we know. Anything else seems weird.

Now here’s another incident. About six years ago, we were watching the movie, “A Christmas Story,” at home together. Remember the scene where Ralphie gets to help his Old Man change the tire. As Ralphie holds the lug nuts, the Old Man accidentally knocks them in the air with the tire tool and Ralphie says, “Oh, Fudge!” The narrator explains, “Only I didn’t say ‘Fudge.’ I said the other word. The queen mother of all curse words.”

My first born was about ten at the time. It was fascinating to hear my children discuss together what that other word might be. Does anyone doubt that if they had been in public school, my children would have known that other word?

By homeschooling, we let our children keep their innocence a bit longer than most. I know. It’s weird. And it’s good.

Comments

[chuck aka xtnyoda]

We homeschooled the three of ours. Oldest is in his PHD program. 2nd has her masters through the Univ. of Memphis. 3rd is working on his masters.

All three have done their education full scholarships.

Worked pretty well for us/them.

[BroKen]

Wow, Chuck, that is so weird! Congratulations. I hope and pray mine do as well.

[chuck aka xtnyoda]

We started the first year it became legal in our state... mid 80's... so we were breaking "new" ground... we were definitely weird!

Lived through all the extreme stereotypes.

I think we are on a homeland security list somewhere! :-)

God Bless, and I'm going to be in prayer with you.

When one thinks about it... what gives the state the right to think that our children are their responsibility to educate... and would even have laws that make it illegal for parents to educate their own children?!

My children didn't belong to the state. That in fact is the very issue that got me to thinking...

[Frank]

Yep, my childhood was ruined because I in fact knew the "fudge" alternative. Really?

My brother-in-law hugs and kisses his children good bye. Once while at my nephews football game (junior high level) my nephew was hesitant to show affection in front of his team when said brother-in-law hugged and kissed him good bye.

Upon realizing this he placed a firm hand on my nephew and said something along the lines of, "I'm your father and I love you, never be ashamed to kiss and hug me no matter what." See, he showed his son the right way, he didn't have to yank him out of public school.

Hands on parenting and all three of his kids continuously make honor roll. Home schooling won't save your fragile children any more than good parenting, period.

[BroKen]

Did I ever say your childhood was ruined, Frank? Do YOU think exposing children to profanity is a good thing?

I'm sure your anecdote trumps mine. So be it. You are convinced that educational warehouses where one size fits all are the best way for children to learn, fine.

But why do you have this chip on your shoulder?

[Frank]

Chip? It's not a chip, it's me being tired of overly sensitive people thinking that we must continually shelter our children from something as abstract as a "bad word". Oooh, bad words, watch out. Grow up, better yet grow a pair.

[BroKen]

OK, it's not a chip, if you say so. But you post a sarcastic comment as if the post concerns you ("my childhood was ruined") when the post concerns you... not at all.

What is your point? Oh, that I should "grow a pair"? Thank you for you concern but really, why do you care? Obviously, something else is going on here. So, I'll ask again.

Why the chip?

[Frank]

I thought this was a site to express ourselves? Here is my expression: I think it ignorant to assume that by sheltering your children through homeschooling you are somehow protecting them.

Profanity has the power and offense you assign to it. Scholastic potential has more to do with parenting and less to do with public schooling. I consider it coddling and largely socially retarding.

Your two examples are weak and I feel you are judging families with children who happen to know the "fudge" word at a young age. My old man was no-nonsense, curse words existed and if I said them I got smacked so I didn't say them.

Sheltering and avoidance are not ways to teaching. Your methods are completely uncalled for. That's my opinion (or "chip", if you prefer).

[BroKen]

Express ourselves? Sure, that's what goes on here. I got that you think I'm ignorant, weak, and judgmental. Your opinion. You're welcome to it. But you'll understand if I find it offensive.

Personally, I think your understanding of homeschooling as education and as a movement is limited and probably skewed. One might even call it ignorant but you'd likely say that was "tit for tat" and stop listening.

So, you think it better to smack a kid who says "fudge" than to shelter them from that offensive power until they are older. Again, you're welcome to that opinion.

"Sheltering and avoidance are not ways to teaching." That, of course, depends on what your are avoiding and what your are teaching.

Frank, I'm glad you are here. If nothing else, you really keep us on our toes.

[Frank]

I don't think you are all of these things rolled up into one. That is just what I think of your views regarding this matter.

I've read other things from you which I have agreed with and mean no insult of a personal manner, sorry, but I will attack your stance. Game on.

Unfortunately I have really ran out of steam on the matter as it is strictly two opinions. If you do a good job home school more power to you, I still find it extrememly annoying.

I will however discuss hitting children. Smacking them is acceptable to me in certain circumstances. Not all children and not all the time. I was "hit" as they say. I prefer the term "swat". You get hit by a bus, you get a swat from Grandma. Puts it in context and takes the overly dramatic sting out of the term.

Of course child punishment is a deep topic. If a rather shabby looking lady in a mismatched sweat suit is beating one of her seven children with a cigarette hanging out of her mouth in the Wal-Mart parking lot that is one thing.

If a father gives a kid one solid spank and then a talking to that is another.

[BroKen]

Thanks for the power. I understand running out of steam, but I am curious why you would find homeschooling "extremely annoying". That's what made me think you had a chip on your shoulder.

Have you had bad experiences with homeschoolers? Do you know some family that you think do it poorly? Why does homeschooling annoy you?

I agree with you about a well-placed and well-timed swat.

[Frank]

Now this is purely my cloudy vision I know but I cannot separate home schooling from religion and all of the indoctrination and carbon copy thinking that I distain. In the home constantly, becoming well versed in the parent’s views, socially inexperienced, soft, etc.

I can imagine better parents doing a far better job but I have not seen it. I know that does not negate your results but I still support public schools largely. Again, admittedly biased.

But we're here so maybe you can tell me how the curriculum is kept up and who enforces this? That has interested me.