... but incompetent ones to boot:
Pssst! I have a not-so-secret to tell you: America is no place for uppity black folks. At least that's what I've been finding out lately.
Republican Rep. Lynn Westmoreland of Georgia actually used this dated word, which means a black person -- usually striving to get educated and live a better life -- who doesn't know her place: "Just from what little I've seen of her and Mr. Obama, Sen. Obama, they're a member of an elitist-class individual that thinks that they're uppity."
Another Georgian, Rick Goddard, invoked it too: "Last night, Newt Gingrich disarmed a very uppity newscaster who tried to question him on the capabilities and leadership of Gov. Palin," the retired Air Force general said about a black journalist.
This sentiment isn't limited to grass-chewing Southerners, considering a recent AP-Stanford University poll that validates what I've suspected: If Barack Obama doesn't win in November, we can blame racism.
...
I really can't blame white Americans for their misgivings. I want to, but I can't. It seems many of us are hard-wired to cling to our biases even in the face of new facts that overturn our beliefs, says Robert Burton, author of On Being Certain, in a piece at Salon. Burton cites a Cornell University study showing that incompetent people tend to overestimate their abilities, fail to recognize other people's skill and don't see the "extremity of their inadequacy." He links "unshakable self-confidence" to feelings of conviction or rightness -- what we might call the gut. Neurologically speaking, these feelings don't help us make better decisions.
Unless, of course, you're unshakably of the belief that America is racist if they choose anyone but Obama in November. Then conviction or rightness is to be treasured and trumpeted.
Such freakin' idiocy I think I've never seen. And yet some will buy into this garbage no questions asked.
Serious stupidity.
Serious.
H/T Tom Elia.












Leading researchers at Pulled Outta Myass University have successfully connected this trend of hypersensitivity toward imagined racial slights, to a dramatic increase in the phenomenon known as global climate change.
"The science is settled," said Dr. Phil Uvitt, Ph.D., lead researcher whose findings will be published this week. "In 1998 the democrat party began in earnest to defend Bill Clinton, who was regarded by many as the first black President of the United States. That's when this latest chapter of racial hypersensitivity began. And, as any fool knows, 1998 was the warmest year on record. Since then, we've seen the lines on the graph perfectly line up, and hey if that's good enough for Al Gore it's good enough for me."
Experts like Dr. Uvitt agree there are several things you can do to help fight the Racial Hypersensitivity Global Climate Change Problem. Something as simple as choosing a competent, qualified candidate to be President will eliminate the need to go accusing total strangers of racism, and experts say this will have additional benefits for you as well -- such as lowering your blood pressure, helping you live longer, and you'll feel better too. Stop reading the Huffington Post, Democratic Underground -- or Deborah Douglas of the Chicago Sun Times. Or if you do have to support completely unqualified candidates for high office just because of the color of their skin, try to find one who doesn't have a lifelong history of associating closely with America-hating a**holes. And knows there are fifty states in the nation.
In extreme cases, in which you can't find such a candidate who agrees with your views, experts agree you should probably seek professional help.
By practicing these helpful tips, and a few others, you can help do your part to put this awful trend in check, and who knows, perhaps we can save the planet. Together, we can do this.
Posted by: Morgan K Freeberg | Sunday, September 28, 2008 at 09:55 AM
Damn Morgan... that was one of your best...
I think I'll put up the whole thing as it's own post.
Priceless.
Posted by: Rick | Sunday, September 28, 2008 at 10:04 AM
So, what's wrong with us uppity bigots who want Bobby Jindal on the national stage in a few years? He's not exactly white, even though he's not from Africa.
What is this sad obsession we have with morals, ethics and having a few brain cells?
Woe is us.
*rolls eyes*
Posted by: Mommynator | Sunday, September 28, 2008 at 11:37 AM
You are a moron...and you spelled deap-seated wrong.
And seriously, you think supporting black rights makes you unhealthy and could impact the effects of global warming?
I didn't think there was such a thing as someone who denies global warming, but I guess I'm wrong...
...someone who says that global warming is caused by "uppity black folks" is stupider than someone who denies global warming...
Posted by: Sam | Saturday, November 08, 2008 at 09:15 PM
Thanks Sam... I corrected the spelling...
Posted by: Rick | Saturday, November 08, 2008 at 09:21 PM